Home Archive By Category "News" (Page 5)
Mating Cows Suspected As Cause of Traffic Backup on Highway 101

Mating Cows Suspected As Cause of Traffic Backup on Highway 101

Smiths Grove, KY—An unusual traffic backup on Highway 101 with no obvious explanation left police and highway engineers scratching their heads, but some suspect that the root cause may have been two aggressively mating cows. The backup started two miles north of city limits starting around 5 p.m., and at its height it stretched over […]

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Man Misses Own Wedding After Cat Falls Asleep On His Lap

Man Misses Own Wedding After Cat Falls Asleep On His Lap

Pensacola, FL—Local barber Thomas Kensington was preparing for his wedding yesterday morning when he became trapped under his sleeping cat. The episode began at approximately 10:15 a.m. when he sat down on the couch for a few minutes of respite after a long morning of preparations. His plan was to rest briefly before taking a […]

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Neighborhood Dog Choir Taking Applications Through September 1

Neighborhood Dog Choir Taking Applications Through September 1

Charlotte, NC—The dogs in the Westerly Hill Neighborhood Association are still taking applications for its dog choir through September 1. Applicants are not required to have prior experience, but must be able to demonstrate their ability during an interview. Established in 1961, the choir is composed of volunteer dogs in the Westerly Hills Neighborhood who […]

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Man Excitedly Celebrates His Hamster’s 27th Birthday

Man Excitedly Celebrates His Hamster’s 27th Birthday

Chino, CA—Leading the rest of the family, local bicycle mechanic Todd Bronson sang Happy Birthday to his pet hamster last Thursday for the 27th time. The hamster, Pepperoni, which Bronson named after his favorite pizza topping when he was 5, was given a treat shaped like a birthday cake to celebrate. Bronson, the youngest of […]

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Shiba Inu Gives Pained Smile After 8000th Doge Joke

Shiba Inu Gives Pained Smile After 8000th Doge Joke

Portland, OR—Nodding politely, local Shiba Inu Marco conjured up yet another pained smile in response to his owner’s friend making what he believes to be the 8000th doge joke he has been the subject of. Over the past few minutes, Marco had braced himself for the inevitable as his owner ran into a friend while […]

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Airlines to Ban All Emotional Support Humans From Flights

Airlines to Ban All Emotional Support Humans From Flights

Atlanta, GA—Yesterday Delta Airlines formally banned the use of emotional support humans for both domestic and international flights, making it the last major carrier in the U.S. to do so. The rule change comes after a growing movement that has for the past several years pointed to alleged abuse by passengers who would bring humans […]

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Local Cat 70% Certain Bug on Wall Is Actually Paint Spot

Local Cat 70% Certain Bug on Wall Is Actually Paint Spot

Fargo, ND—His eyes fixed on a spot on the ceiling near the anterior wall of the house, local cat Percy is debating what he’s actually staring at. The episode began shortly after his owner, local fitness instructor Sam Neal, left for work. Percy walked into the bedroom intending to find a sunny spot, and after […]

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Neighborhood Jerk Still Not Interested In Letting You Pet Him

Neighborhood Jerk Still Not Interested In Letting You Pet Him

Champaign, IL—A black and white cat known by various names in the Robeson Park neighborhood still reportedly has no interest in being petted, no matter how much he hints to the contrary. “Oh yeah, I’ve seen that putz around here a bunch,” said Miriam Gage, who runs the nearby laundromat. “Li’l Sneakers. He comes up […]

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