After months of trying to ignore the problem and hope it resolved itself on its own, local cat Meister plans to confront his human roommate, Kurtis Dodson, about his ongoing hygiene issues. Meister had been telling himself that he could continue letting Dodson, a gas station attendant and former member of a local punk band,…
Oh. Drat. You're giving me that look, and you're also saying something kind of loudly, and you have the angry eyes going on. I'm guessing this is not the litter box. Did I get it wrong? Again? My bad. Here, I'll stop. I was only halfway done, so I'll just go finish in the right…
Schenectady, NY—Local pun-making horse Brutus was found in a field on the edge of town, standing but unconscious, with his mane shaved off. Brutus belongs to local farmer Mike McMillan, and appears to have been stolen sometime after 8 p.m. Wednesday night and was identified by a pedestrian early Thursday morning. Brutus was quickly loaded…
Basking in the warm essence of the universe's vast stores of cosmic energy, local dog and confirmed good boy Kite has realized that he need no longer strive to be good, because he already is. The revelation came to him in a moment of quiet expectation, waiting for his human to come home from work.…
Rapid City, SD—Sitting on a chair in the kitchen, local pug Munchkin feels confident that her owner has not yet noticed that she is transfixed by the caramel marshmallow pie cooling on the counter. Munchkin smelled the pie while it was in the oven. "I was upstairs eating one of Master's Crocs," Munchkin told a…
